Monday, October 3, 2011

Shutdown -r

I am not someone who gives up easy, for I have had to fight for everything, but right now I am at a point where things have been rough for a long while, and I’m just plain tired. I am dissatisfied with everything, dissatisfied with life itself. How is it that you work hard to build something, and all of a sudden you get tired of it? I know I have been going on about change for a while now, but now it’s time. Wheels of change are in motion, and everything from this life must go, everything that makes me sad. I do not regret anything that I’ve done, for every incident, every scar teaches you something. I am just scared of what the future might hold. As a start, I’ve decided to lose the pot belly I’ve grown in the past few years, and have hence started pushing my body beyond what I thought it was capable of. I’ve grown fond of running. Nothing beats the feeling of having no thoughts at all, except the one about gulping down large volumes of air, and still being breathless. Sometimes I even get “runner’s high”. Fewer hours at work has been a side effect of this new addiction. There is a lot I have to set right. Recently, I read this blog post and really liked the analogy. I have realized that I have been concentrating so hard to get my pebbles in my jar, that I haven’t left much room for the rocks. It’s funny how it’s the rocks define you, yet the world judges you by your pebbles and sand. There were so may things I’d aimed at achieving, so many goals I’ve missed. I guess it’s time to reboot.

No comments: